Friday, November 18, 2005

Eric Saltzovich's 3-step plan to financial success: A confidential strategy for prospective parents

Whoa nelly, do I have a plan for you! Here's the catch- keep it on the hush. Listen:

It's one of those things that, if it is revealed to "the many" and not kept among "the few," the situation is spoiled for everyone. Catch my drift...?

Just follow like dis:

Step 1: Both partners work in decent to high-level jobs, with decent to high-paying salaries for first 17 years of first-born child's life. Live healthily and heartily, living a normal life under the circumstances of your income bracket. Stay in good credit and out of debt. Ideal combined salary: $100,000 - 125,000 (minimum)

Step 2: Live in an area with a very good school district until the first born is graduating junior high school. At this point, sell house in good area and buy house in area with a fair - poor school district. This will instill your child with the background and foundation to succeed and excel even in the fair - poor district.

Step 3: When the first-born child is in his junior year of high school, both parents "manage" to get laid-off from their job to collect unemployment. Plan will still work even if one parent can collect and other just quits.


Reason for success:

Relative to other high school students in fair to poor district, the students who are products of our success strategy, who come from the strong backgrounds in strong schools districts will be the upper crust and receive the best test scores, best SAT scores, best grades and be in the upper ranks.


Effects of success:

(1) Your child will get into any ivy league college he/she wants
(2) You get to live off the government for the years your child is in college and do whatever your heart contents in your own home or elsewhere with the money you saved from the past 17 years, the money you're making from unemployment and the money you made by selling your house in an area with high real estate value and buying in an area with a low real estate value.
(3) Your child gets college completely for free with lots of scholarships and government funding due to unemployed parents.
(4) Your child is grateful for your aid in getting him or her opportuinities and finances your trips, food and entertainment for the rest of your life, due to their cushy job.

You and your family - 1

Vs.

The economy - 0



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